This year's elk hunt was a total bust. I have never hunted so hard, hiked so far, and hurt so much, and seen so few elk. I shaved off two weeks worth of facial hair yesterday...damn, it feels good to be clean again. My sleep schedule is all messed up now. I'm used to going to bed around 8:30 or 9:00 p.m., and waking at 6:00 a.m.

I don't think I'll be doing any big game hunting again for several years. It takes up too much time and money and effort to be worthwhile. I spent $50 on a license, $50 for gas, and much more on ammo, gear, food, and all that stuff. I used up 4 precious vacation days. And worst of all, my body is going to be stiff and sore for weeks to come.

I used to think I was a kind of a hick, but that's so far from the truth. Most of the guys I hunted with were bigger hicks than I ever imagined existed. Sitting around the campfire, talking about pastures, cattle, sheep, and coal mining just isn't my idea of fun. And you can only hear the phrase "Ain't nobody got nothin' on my daddy's mutton" so many times before you openly bust out laughing at somebody. Of course, the mutton wasn't that bad, but it was greasy as hell...I'll probably never eat it again.