Some guy from the Ukraine added me to his contact list, so I added him to mine. He didn't send a message immediately, so I just said, "Umm...hello. :)"

He responded with:

"I'm sorry: error.
I want to get acquainted with female-disabled."

Go now, sucka.

My wife and I went with some friends to Huntington Reservoir to do some water skiing, but it ended up being way too windy. We just boated around the lake for a bit, then decided to get dragged behind the boat on a tube for a very short while. I thought my nads were going to freeze right off, it was so cold.

Yesterday, it was unbearably hot, and today it ends up being windy and chilly. This weather sucks ass.

You know your mom is cool when she buys the new Stone Temple Pilots album before you get a chance. Now I'm going to have to borrow it from her and rip the CD. :)

I am an uncle yet again today. My sister had a baby boy at 9:53 this morning. His name is Adrian Richard, and he's actually pretty cute, for a baby. Most babies are ass-ugly when they're born (women don't seem to think so, though). Anyway, congrats to my sis. :)

Well, this weekend has already been damn fun. As soon as I got off work yesterday, I went camping in Huntington Canyon, which is just a half-hour drive from here. There's a narrow winding canyon road that goes way up in the mountains, and it's some of the most beautiful scenery around (except for the Arches/Canyonlands National Parks). I wish I had my fishing license already, because fishing is the only thing that could have made it any more fun.

Tomorrow, I'm going to spend the night at my bro-in-law's place, then go to the cave Monday morning with a bunch of friends. I'm really looking forward to that, and I'm bringing a camera, so I'll have more worthless pictures to put in that section of the site. :)

The Funhouse got a new layout, and it's lookin' pretty nice. I dig that logo.

And Ramblings has been added to the links on this page. I like that site much more now that it's just Reg posting.

Ever wonder what your site would look like in Netscape 1.1?

For the morbidly curious, you can download Netscape 1.1 here. Note: this is a self-extracting executable, so just make sure to save it to a temp folder before launching it. I made the mistake of launching it from my download folder, and had to find and delete all the setup files when I was done installing, 'cause I had 50 or so other files in the same folder. :)

Heheh...that's a damn good slogan. :) Go check out the new digs over at Rebelonet. I really like those colors...

Somebody was just parked in front of my house taking pictures of the house. It was a man and a woman in a gold Honda Accord with a kid in the back seat. I was on the computer when my wife called me to the front door, and by the time I got there, they were pulling away. I seriously thought about hopping in the car and following them, but I didn't. Now I'm wishing I had ran outside with a baseball bat and broken their back window or something as they pulled off... That's just really disturbing...maybe somebody's stalking me. :)

Women shouldn't be allowed to drive, period. My wife and I went to Gas-N-Go to get something to drink, and she was driving 'cause she was going to her mom's house after she dropped me off back home. As she was taking a corner, she cut it really sharp and drove over a grate that the gutter drains into. The road had been paved so many times without the previous layers of pavement being removed, that the grate was sunk down about 4 or 5 inches below the road surface. My truck could have handled a bump like that, but definitely not my car. It jolted the car so damn bad, I hit my head on the ceiling. When we stopped at Gas-N-Go, I checked to see if there was any damage, and there sure was. The top of the front-right tire had hit the fender hard enough to bend it, causing the paint to crack and peel. There was already a little body damage there from a previous wreck, but now it looks even worse with black primer showing through. I'm surprised it didn't cut the tire too, which would have made me even more pissed off.

I was really pissed off as it was, and my wife simply said, "Sorry, I didn't see it." I sure as hell saw it, and I even said, "Whoa!" but it was too late for her to swerve.

Sure, any guy could have made that same mistake, and some women might even have avoided it, but I sure as fucking hell wouldn't have driven over it.

Man, I love having a radar detector. It's saved my ass more times that I can remember. I had my driver's license suspended for three months a while back because I had so many speeding tickets, but I haven't gotten a ticket since I got this radar detector. And I speed a lot more now, not 'cause I have a radar detector, but because I have a really fast car. But still, I never leave home without it. :)

This guy thinks I'm "weird." Ok, I guess I am. But he's definitely got some design skillz. I don't really dig the popup window or scroll thing, but the graphics and layout are nice.

Oh, and RegBarc just reminded me to plug Ramblings. He's on Stu's server until he gets his dns problems worked out.

In November of last year, I cut my arm while removing some parts from a truck at a junkyard. It wasn't a very deep cut, but it looked nasty. It healed up really strange, with a puffy scar that sometimes itched or hurt. So I went to my doctor this morning to have him take a look at it. He said it was caused by the wound healing too well, leaving an excess of scar tissue. He said an injection of cortizone would help to shrink it. So he got a syringe of this very thick white goop and started injecting it into the scar. In addition to it being very painful, it was the most disgusting thing I'd seen in a long time. The scar puffed up even worse, and you could see it filling up with the cortizone. There's nothing quite like seeing something being injected under your skin and forming a large visible bulge...

When I got back to work, it hurt too bad to type, so I just headed home for the day. Right now, it's bruised all around the scar, and I can still see white splotches of cortizone under the skin. It's still really tender too, but at least I can twist my forearm enough to type.

I got a letter in the mail from Assman today. Consequently, my wife and I have decided to move to Siberia, where hopefully that sicko won't find us.

Seriously, it was a funny-as-hell letter, with some really...uh...interesting illustrations. Maybe I'll scan it in for you all to see...it will make you feel very normal. :)

Man, Rebelo owns my ass at Quake II. :) If you get a chance, connect to his server at rebelo.dhs.org and play for a while.

Sweet, Digital Murder is back. I only checked the site once a week since it shut down, but it's now right over there ------>

Most of the people in Utah disillusion themselves, thinking they can explain every criminal act by using drugs as a scapegoat. They don't quite understand that some people are just bad, or just plain stupid.

I was reading an article in the Salt Lake Tribune, and the writer says, in regard to road rage, "The common thread to these senseless terrors may be methamphetamine." He goes on to say, "If such a person has a gun (what criminal doesn't?) anybody nearby could become a target..."

From now on, I think I'm just going to lock myself up in my house, never to go outside again. After all, you never know who might be out there, wielding a firearm, all hopped up on meth. It's a good thing I read the newspaper, too, or else I'd never have found out about this, and I'd probably be lying in a pool of my own blood on the sidewalk in front of my house.

Source: Salt Lake Tribune

Yesterday went very well. It was just a preliminary hearing to determine if there was enough evidence to prosecute, and the judge determined that there was definitely enough evidence. The Bitch was there for two different cases; one forgery, and the other forgery, theft, drug posession, and drug paraphernalia possession. She goes to trial near the end of June, but I'm not sure if I'm going to be called as a witness then. I'm sure she'll end up going to prison for this eventually, but I'm not so sure she'll show up for her court date.

This morning, I got a subpoena to appear in court tomorrow for a preliminary hearing for that hoochie-momma who stole my checks two years ago. The court is still sending mail to my old address in Springville, so they're lucky that I got the subpoena at all. I guess I'm lucky that I received too, or else I'd probably have a warrant out for my arrest. :) Since Salt Lake City is a 2+ hour drive from here, I'll have to take the entire day off work. Woohoo!

Well, my anniversary went very well...much better than the nightmare that happened last year.

I heard from a good friend today, Mike Marshall, that he's getting married. Wow. That really came as a shock to me...he was the last one of my friends (besides G.I. Jorge) that I expected to get married this soon. It'll happen on July 21^st, so I'll have to take that day off from work.

I really miss my truck. I keep having dreams that I get it back, but it runs worse than before the engine got rebuilt. I hope that's not the case, 'cause I just bought a brand new aluminum baseball bat...

Today is my 2nd wedding anniversary, so I'm not going to spend the day online. I took a vacation day from work today, but I have to drive into the office tomorrow, so I probably won't post until late tomorrow or possibly Wednesday. Later. :)

Some dudes I talked to on IRC:

http://cougr.digital-gangsters.net/

http://www.nathanism.com/

http://www.thedaytoday.com/

http://www.f1nk.net/

http://www.kidkorn.com/

Vote.

It seems Chinese and Italian food tied in the last poll. Every time I checked, they were both even, and ended up with 23 votes each.

Sweet. We're goin' to the cave on the 29th of May. I hope I'll be able to bring my truck, 'cause I know my car can't handle the dirt roads out there...

/server irc.unigrinder.com

/join #e/n

I went down to check on my truck today, and it's still in pieces. The mechanic said they had to ship some parts away to be machined, and they wouldn't be back until Monday, when they would begin reassembly. So instead of it taking three weeks, it looks more like it'll be five.

Since my carburetor was a total piece of shit, it's being replaced by a Holley 4 barrel. My clutch was almost shot, so it's getting replaced too. The clutch should be pretty damn cheap, since the engine is already out of the truck and everything is easy to get to. I wouldn't be surprised if I'm into this truck another 4 grand (on top of the $1,300 I paid for it) by the time it's finished. I hope it's worth it.

Whatever happened to being politically correct? I was just reading an article in Time Digital about Napster, and it had this to say: "When a Napster member rips a song off a regular audio CD and adds it to her Napster playlist, it becomes available to anyone else in the network..." It used to be that whenever you were speaking about a generic individual, the pronouns "he" or "his" were very commonly used. Then, with all the women-folk complaining, it became "he/she" or "his/her." Now, it's ok to use just "her?" I don't think so. Coincidentally, this article was written by a woman. Surprise, surprise.

One more post before I go play Super Mario Brothers...

You wanna see a really good, very underrated e/n (more like blog) site? Go here.

My wife and I ate dinner over at Ty's house on Saturday, and he and I went to the liquor store afterwards to get some wine. I got a bottle of Gossamer Bay chardonnay for $12 (and a bottle of Jager, of course). I always used to get the cheap-o 3 liter bottles with screw on caps for $8, and I decided I wanted to try some real wine. So anyway, when I tried this wine the next day (had to borrow a corkscrew from me mum), it was pretty awful. It was the most dry wine I've ever tasted...no flavor at all.

So I went to the liquor store again today (god damn fucking Utah lawmakers), and picked up a different bottle of wine. This time I got Ernest & Julio Gallo Café Zinfandel for $5 (it was discounted for some reason), and it's some damn good stuff. It's not too sweet nor too dry, and it's a little bubbly as well. I'm definitely going to go down tomorrow and pick some more up before it's all gone.

Solo, don't do it. You know all those ICQ chicks are ex-dudes. :)

And J, good luck. ;) Like you said, coffee ain't a crime.

The House of Reign/Beyond Teen Loser. There, you happy? I like orange. :) That's not a bad layout...minus the frames, of course.

Yes, I know I'm neurotic. That blue layout was pretty good, but I like this one much better than any I've done.

Heh...I got an email this morning that just said, "pssst... http://www.gyrate.org/". It's one hell of a wacky, zany site. Ok, seriously it's some pretty good shit. Go there.

I know Sung and Brandon have both been talkin' about how hot it is. It was pretty hot here two days ago, yesterday it got cool enough to turn the furnace back on, but today was downright nasty. I had to drive in to the office today, and I ran rain, snow, and fog the whole way. I should have just turned around and went home, but for some reason I wanted to go to work today.

The drive home was pretty nice, though. My wife called me at work because of a family emergency (I don't really wanna go into that now...), so I left immediately and hauled ass home (more so than usual). With blatant disregard for my own safety, I was passing people like mad and taking corners way too fast. I would have made it home in record time, but with all the road construction and heavy traffic, I made it home in the usual hour and ten minutes. The emergency turned out to be a false alarm, thank the devil, and now I can't help but think I risked my life for nothing. Seriously, I was driving that crazily...

Yeah, you've heard from a few sites that Gladiator is one hell of a badass movie. And lemme tell you, it sure as hell is. The only movie I ever saw twice in the theater was Pulp Fiction, but I might go see Gladiator a couple more times. About half-way through the movie, I realized that I was very tense and hadn't moved a millimeter since it started. You just get so immersed in the film that you forget about the outside world. This may be my new favorite movie, but I'll wait 'til I see it again to know for sure.

I actually did get the virus sent to me by somebody at work. Since I'm on 4 different distribution lists in the Outlook global address book at work, I got it 4 times. And this is after a company-wide email alert telling people not to open the attachment. They really ought to fire the woman who was dumb enough to do it.

I've only updated the movie reviews section once since I started it, but I'll do some updating this weekend. I've seen a bunch of movies recently that I've just been too lazy to review.

I rented The Dark Crystal from NetFlix, but it won't be here until Monday. I must have watched that movie 50 times when I was a kid (like 6 or 7 years old), but I don't remember much about it other than it was a badass movie. I also rented Beetlejuice because my wife has never seen it, and it's a pretty good movie too. Sure, it gets old after watching it several times, but it's been a long time since I've seen it.

I got something in the mail today from the Salt Lake County District Attorney's Office. At first, I thought they had finally caught up to me, but it turned out to be something very good.

About two years ago, on the 4th of July, I got a call from a check-cashing place called Cash Action in Salt Lake City asking if I had written a check to somebody for $300 for auto parts, which I sure as hell hadn't. So I looked in my checkbook and noticed several checks missing. Some (alleged) fucking bitch had (allegedly) stolen some checks from me and was cashing them all over the state.

I had completely given up on her facing charges, but she finally went to court over the matter yesterday. I got the notice letter a little late because it was originally mailed to my old address in Springville, and the good ol' USPS takes its sweet time forwarding mail down here. She was charged with 3rd degree felony forgery, and hopefully she was convicted. I'm gonna call up there later today to find out what happened, but I'm pretty certain she's in jail right now.

Christ, I've already gotten 3 "VIRUS ALERT!!!!!" emails today; one from my ISP and two from work. These email viruses that propagate themselves generate more email by people without the virus than with it. I'll probably never recieve an email with the virus attached, but you better believe I'll get 10 emails warning me of it.

Damn, I sounded bitchy in that last post. I emailed the poor fellow, and I think I was a tad harsh. Oh well...

Anyway, I've been up for the last several hours creating a Winamp skin. It's not the most fancy skin in the world, but it's simple and clean. Knock yourself out, kid:

Update: I updated the zip file because I screwed up on the colors for the address bar in the minibrowser. The foreground and background colors were both set to red.

I just hate whores who think they can steal my layout, link to my site, and think I won't find out, or even care. 'Cause know what? I will find out, and I do care. I'm not even gonna give this guy any traffic, so I'm not going to put a link up. But thanks to my man for givin' me the heads up.

There's only one thing about owning a home that's worse than renting an apartment, and that's not having a landlord to call when something goes wrong. The plastic bolts that hold the tank to the base of the toilet came loose, and about a half-inch of water was standing on the floor when I found out about it. It didn't do any permanent damage, but it was a pain in the ass to clean up. At least it wasn't water out of the bowl...

I've been listening to Poe a lot lately. She totally kicks my ass. I've had the album Hello for a couple years now, but I never listened to it much until recently. It's been in the CD player in my car for several days now, and I'm gonna have to rip the CD so I can listen to it while I'm working too.

The funniest thing happened the other day. I was flipping through the channels, and when I came to MTV, they were playing Big Pimpin' by Jay-Z. Normally, I would have just changed the channel, but you know what? That song is actually pretty good. I didn't ever think anybody would come out with a decent rap (or hip-hop or whatever) song, at least not since back in the days of NWA, Dre, and Snoop. That was some good shit, but everything since then blows. Even Dre and Snoop's newer stuff sucks a fat dick. Beeeeeatch.

Looks like Mr. Rebelo is cooking somethin' up...somethin' special for all us folks. So stay tuned, and spread the hype.

They really need to do something about those Bayer Aspirin commercials. Every time they play one on TV, and I'm not paying attention, they say "Bayer Aspirin" and all I hear is "bare ass." I get all worked up for a second until I realize it's not what I think. Damnit.

I'm always the fastest person driving between Provo and Price. Period. I never get passed in the whole 70 miles of canyon road. But today, some guy in a white Olds Alero roasted my ass. I was doing 85 or 90, and this guy flew by me doing at least 105. I gunned it and tried to keep up with him, but my car just couldn't handle it going up such a steep hill. I eventually caught up to him when he got behind a semi and was unable to pass. Not too long after that, he passed twice in no-passing zones, and I never saw him again. Mad props to you, man. Whoever you are.

Assman asked me for my home address yesterday, so I'll probably be getting an autographed pair of underwear from him pretty soon. I'm stoked. :)

Bleh...I gotta drive up to work tomorrow, and since my old manager no longer works there, things are probably going to be a lot different than before. It's kind of strange having a manager who has the same position that I used to be in. But I enjoy being a peon much more than being a manager, just because it's a lot less stressful. I probably work a little harder than before, but it's worth it to be able to work from home and have less responsibility.