Today feels like a Saturday. I've got the day off from work tomorrow, so I'm gonna do some more work around the yard and house. There's always something that needs to be done around here, and it seems like I never do much else. I had some fun today, though. After mowing and watering the lawn, my wife and I went for a drive on some dirt roads, came home and barbequed some hamburgers, then went and flew kites for a while. It was just plain relaxing. I somehow managed to catch an earring on my kite string, and it ripped right out of my ear. It hurt bad enough that I thought it tore my ear lobe, but luckily the back came off the earring and it got flung about 30 feet away. And I actually managed to find the earring and the back in the grass, though.

I'm just curious as to how unusual it is for me to be a racing fan. Is anybody else out there into that stuff? Leave a comment down yonder.

BTW, Tony Stewart has moved from 32^nd up to 5^th place so far, and hopefully he'll go on to win today's race. He's really hurtin' in the points this year so far. Like you give a shit. :)

I bought a barbeque today, but had a pretty bad experience at first. I got it home and had it almost completely assembled, and realized that I had gotten the wrong one. The one I wanted came with a gas burner on one side, so you can fry eggs or some shit like that in a pan, and the one I actually got didn't have the burner. So my wife and I took the damn thing apart, put it back in the box (which was next to impossible), and took it back to K-Mart. I wasn't entirely sure they'd let me trade it back in, but we didn't have any problems. So I had to assemble this one too, but it went pretty quickly since I didn't have to read the instructions this time. :)

I cut all the roots on one of those trees that I tried to yank out of the ground with my truck a couple weeks ago, and my brother in law tried with his truck (a '93 Ranger 4x4) today, and it still won't come out. It actually moved a bit this time, but I think the taproot must be damn huge. I'm going to fill the hole around the tree up with water tomorrow and let it soak in for a while, and try again.

The engine in my truck won't be done for another week or so, and I really miss it. :( I went and visited it today, and it looks like it's doing well. The front end is riding damn high without an engine in it, and the radiator and tons of other parts are in the bed. I can't wait 'til I get it back, but I'm not looking forward to the break-in period. I don't know the exact details of breaking in an engine, but I'm sure I won't be able to drive like I'm used to. I can't keep my foot off the gas at all. I'm pretty bad in my car, since it's really fast (peels out in 2nd gear easily), but with a new engine in my truck, it'll be hard to hold back.

I got a new poll up, vote.

Here are the results of the previous poll:

C'mon, we all know Conan is a badass. For some reason, nobody voted for Craig Kilborn. Oh wait, that's because he wasn't in the poll. :) Hmm...I wonder why.

I guess I'm not a very fashionable guy when it comes to clothing. I usually just wear jeans (somewhat baggy) and t-shirts. And all my t-shirts are bland, mostly greys and blues, with no designs or fancy-schmancy stuff like that on 'em. But today, I bought some pretty cool (er...trendy) clothes. I got some of those big board shorts, you know, the ones that double as a parachute, and some nifty t-shirts. Now, from what I've seen on TV, I think all I need is a pair of cargo pants and I'm good to go. Oh, and one of those Chinese chicks on my back.

Check out the new layout over at Sloppy Rage. Give me mad props. Thankyouverymuch. I spent a couple of hours designing a layout for Assman, and it totally sucked. So I started from scratch and came up with a new one in about 10 minutes, and it's pretty damn sweet.

Oh yeah, I'm posting over at Sung's for a short while because he's out of town. Own.

My manager at work (and also a good friend of mine) is leaving the company tomorrow, so my wife and I are going up there to have lunch with him and his wife on his last day of work. But I still gotta put in 8 hours of work, take my wife to a doctor's appointment, and do some clothes shopping. And add 3 hours of driving time to all that. So I have a huge day ahead of me. Hopefully it will be fun, though. I get paid tomorrow, and I already know what I'm going to spend most of it on (since I'm in between house payments this pay period). I'm getting a new gas barbeque, a deer hunting permit for this coming up season (in October), some clothes, some flowers and plants for my yard, and all kinds of other things that I don't really need. Maybe even a concealed weapons permit. :) Damn crazy gun-toting Americans...

I've been seriously thinking about getting a handgun, but I know I can't afford it right now. Just to get a concealed weapons permit is $60, plus you have to pay for an instruction course before you can apply. And I'm sure the handgun is gonna cost a pretty penny. This is the one I wanna get:

Looks nice, eh? :) Thanks to Mike for checkin' it out for me in BeOS. I only made sure it worked in IE5 and Netscape 4. Anyway, I moved most of the links to their own links page, and kept my favorites on the front.

I added links to Misunderstood and Sloncha.com. I also told Chris I'd plug Team Dawghouse, so there you go.

Man, I've been on an old-skool gangsta rap kick for the past few days. I pulled out my old Snoop Dogg CD, and I've been listening to Dre and Eazy-E mp3s. It's just funny how white boys like me really get into that gangsta shit.

And, just in case you didn't know, my ICQ number is 4371305. Add me.

I finished the new layout today, but I don't think I'm going to put it up until at least tomorrow, maybe later. I just want to make sure I like it, because I really don't want to go and change it in another month.

I'm downloading On The Prowl from bamf right now. It's 94 megs, and I'm connected at 28.8, so I sure hope I don't get disconnected from my ISP overnight. I booted into win2k just to (hopefully) eliminate any possible crashes in win98.

By Assman -- Since the #Badassmofo Channel is down on IRC, I spend some of my time going into Craft and Stitching Chat Rooms. I go in with a full proof plan of talking about porn and smut in hopes to get kicked out, or else clean out the room so they have to go discuss thier stitchin strategies elsewhere. Or else I will ask them if they will sew me a huge penis or penetration scene. That makes them mad too. So it all honesty....

...Sew this you rat bastards... (_(__)////////D ~ ~

Somebody on IRC pasted this URL into the channel. It's The Urinal Game, where you are presented with a situation, and must choose the correct urinal to use. I saw this game a long time ago, and it's still damn funny now.

Sharkey has a funny as hell mp3 of the moment up. It's a cover of Eazy-E's Boyz in the Hood, Toad the Wet Sprocket style. It's pretty funny to hear white boys singin' it like a pop song. :)

I spent almost all day installing a doorbell in my house. When I moved in, it had one of those shitty wireless doorbells that didn't even work, so I threw that shit away and bought one that runs off of AC. Anyway, I was reading the installation instructions, and they had this propaganda in there:

"Trine door chimes are decorative, as well as functional. Fashionably designed, they may be an exciting focal point in your home. Place them at eye level as you would any picture or artwork"

I got this email today, and thought I'd pass the word on:

Misunderstood & Ellicit will be holding the "Design A Splash Contest" for 1 month (4.23.00-5.23.00). We want it to really be big so we are asking your help. All we ask is that you plug us and tell people about it. Thanks man. http://misunderstood.convicted.net and http://www.ellicit.org

-intek

There's a new poll up, inspired by a debate between those guys on IRC. Go vote.

I never thought I would ever utter these words, but I saw the coolest van tonight. It was a black Ford 4X4 van with a Triton V10, a bigass lift, and 33 X 12.5 tires. It also had a brush guard with a bunch of lights on it. This thing was just totally badass. That's what I love about Easter weekend, there are tons of nice 4X4s going through town on their way to the Jeep Safari in Moab.

I haven't been able to connect to the bamf IRC server for a while, and I heard that the admin (Sion Verdox) is moving, and the server will be back up Sunday sometime. So until then, I'm gonna be hangin' out on #e/n on efnet. There aren't many servers I can connect to, but irc.concentric.net seems to be working for now. Stop by if you get a chance.

God damn it to hell.

Just before Baefed.com went down earlier this week, I got a shitload of hits from them. When I checked my tracker and realized this and went to their site, it was already down. Now that they're back up, I found out that I'm their site of the week. Sweet! :) So check their shit out.

There are so god damn many e/n sites out there now. I really think it's a good thing, though. Someday, who knows when, the internet will become saturated with e/n sites, and most of them will fall back and *not* be replaced with ten more each. And when the fallout settles, who will be there? The big guys, of course, like bamf, roosh, hear ye, shlongy, and hopefully some of the better guys, like techno weenie, ty, rebelo, red, and the other orange-dot guys. But as I try to envision a year or two into the future, I don't know if I can see myself still here doing this. I see myself working, playing, changing diapers, and all that brady bunch shit. Jeez, I just stopped using proper capitalization...

I've gotten tons of link requests lately. Don't worry guys, I'm not ignoring you (much). I've been working on a new layout, and I've sorta been ignoring my site a bit...at least as far as you can tell. It'll be up in a few days, and regular updating shall commence.

Since I moved to Price, I stopped getting decent radio stations. I can get one country station, and one pop station. And that's it. So I've been deaf to the music world lately, and I decided to see what's new. I downloaded some Incubus, Filter, RHCP, and Smashing Pumpkins, and it's sure a welcome change to all the old mp3s I've been listening to. I'm about burned out on Sublime and Tool and Rage.

My tongue hurts. I've been eating sunflower seeds all day, and my tongue is all sore and swollen-feeling. And I don't have enough Dr. Pepper to wash it all down with, damnit.

I was thinking of a damn badass web address I could have if only I could speak German. There is a web host at http://www.de/, and I could probably get them to host me in a subdirectory called "nnis.com", so my full URL would be http://www.de/nnis.com/. How's that for cool?

I'm sitting here, drinking my Jones Cherry Soda, listening to RHCP, wondering what the hell to write. Red had a damn good update today. I thoroughly enjoyed reading it. He reminded me how much I miss that smell. Especially in the morning.

I have to get up at 5:45 tomorrow morning so I can be to work before 7:30. The drive usually takes me 75 minutes or so, thanks to my little Nissan. I love making that drive so early in the morning. The lack of traffic allows me to maintain a decent speed, so on the occasion when I come up behind a deisel, I usually fly around them doing 40 miles an hour faster than them. That's a nice feeling. There have been times when I passed four or five trucks in a row, usually afraid that a car will be coming the opposite direction, leaving me nowhere to go but off the road. I still love making that drive, though.

I was bored and started foolin' around in Photoshop, and came up with a pretty cool layout that I could use for my page, but don't think I actually would. Check it out here (23K GIF Image).

Mr. J.Rebelo changed his layout a bit, and his site is lookin' sweeter than ever. Go check it out.

Go to Solo's site and download the "Hummer Girls" mp3. That thing is so damn hilarious! It's a parody of LFO's Summer Girls song, which sucked a bunch of dick. :)

Update: Nevermind, it looks like he's doing some stuff with his site. It says, "Soon my friends...Soon."

I'm posting this from Windows 2000, baby! I hadda creat a new FAT32 partition on the drive I was installing to, and it finally worked. I let the install create the partition the first time, but it wasn't working right, so I had to boot into win98 and do it myself with good ol' fdisk. And for some reason, the install wouldn't work when I booted from my cdrom, so I had to start it from within win98. Other than those problems, everything else went very smoothly. All my hardware seems to be working properly, and I didn't even have to install any drivers.

I attempted a win2k install last night, but it went horribly wrong. I always get scared when installing something new like this (or any of the flavas of linux I've tried), and this is the reason why. I started the install from within win98, and it did all its mumbo-jumbo before restarting. It had written to the master boot record before restarting, and I assumed that it had gotten rid of LILO from my previous linux install. When it restarted, instead of the install picking back up, LILO tried to load, but it never actually got to the place where I got a choice of which o/s to load. It just said, "LIL-" and froze up there. I tried booting from the CD and starting the install, and I tried booting from a floppy and running the install, but each time the install restarted my computer, LILO froze up on me. I finally decided to go to bed around 4:00 a.m., and just call Ty in the morning to gimme a hand.

Little did I know about the "fixmbr" command. I booted from the CD, chose to repair a current install of win2k, and typed "fixmbr" at the command line. Well, it worked, and now I can at least boot into win98, but now the install gives me an error when it tries to format the hard drive I'm trying to install to. It says something like, "Setup could not format the drive you selected. Either your computer does not have enough memory, or some files on the installation CD are corrupted." It then forces me to exit the install. I guess win2k wasn't meant to exist on my computer.

By Assman -- I drive a '92 Chevy Lumina. It is one sweet peice of ass. I got it for $3,000 bucks and it only has 32,000 miles on it. Friggen Deal eh? My girlfriend and I were driving down the highway and saw a brand new white Chevy Camaro. This thing was sweet ass sweet. So, I'm an ass and decided to see what the ole girl had in her. I dropped the pedal and off we went. The Camaro, driven by a young punk teenager, wanted none of it and took off after me. He smoked my ass to say the least. My 3.1 V6 couldn't take it. So he got back in the right lane and slowed down a little.

I flew by his ass and that didn't make him any happier. He took off after me like your mom when I stole her dildo. But the road turned into a 1 laner and he only found himself tailgating me with the Lumina heading to victory lane.

Moral of the Story: Don't look back, cause you might see something white flying at you!

P.S. Sloppy Rage is back up faster than a viagra eating bear.

I found a decent place that will rebuild the engine in my truck, but the price about killed me. It's gonna cost $3,200 for everything, including all the machining and resurfacing, new water pump, new oil pump, and all that good stuff. I had to rationalize spending that much by telling myself that if I dropped $1,500 or so (about what I paid for my truck) on another truck, it would still have shitloads of miles on the engine, and it would have to be rebuilt soon anyway. The guy that's doing the work warranties the engine for 3 years or 36,000 miles, which is better than I'd get buying a remanufactured engine from a parts store. So it looks like I'll be trying to pay off my credit card bill for the next year or so... :)

There's a new movie review up in the Movies section for True Crime.

Markside Markside Markside Markside Markside.

By Assman -- ...because I saw something tonight that surpassed anything I had ever seen before. A wooly mammoth? No. A 6 holed vagina? I wish! However it was a chocolate lab dog shitting and vomiting grass at the same time. The beauty of a 70 Lb. dog yacking up grass while relieving itself right in front of me. I love nature!

Your glasses will be ready in about an hour Mr. Danson.

By Assman -- Mark informed everyone that the server will be back up by 10 PM central time. Give or take a minute or so. I will be then posting back over at Sloppy Rage. I would like to send out props to Dennis for letting me post here.

"Sucky Sucky, 5 dolla Soldier Boy! Me love you long time!"

I would also like to thank everybody that didn't offer me a temporary spot to upload my site. May you all rot in hell, but be able to still visit my page. Thank you and goodnight!

I followed a link to BullsEyeArt from The Onion, and found a pretty badass Flash animation. Check it out, it's Miss Muffy and the Muff Mob. It's like Strawberry Shortcake on drugs...pretty cool stuff. :)

By Assman -- I was sitting at the table tonight and my parents were talking about my sister just getting into Algebra. She is in eight grade. So I was asking my parents if they had ever taken Algebra in high school. My dad said, "I started to but it was to hard, so I went back to Basic Math!" My mom follows up with, "I don't remember what classes I was in, I think I took Geometric!" What the hell is Geometric? I know realize that I got all my book smarts from the carpet on my livingroom floor because it sure in hell wasn't from my family.

By Assman -- Hey Dennis was nice enough to lend me a temporary posting spot. He is a nice guy and so is his old lady. Buy some tupperwear off of her. She sells all sorts.

Sloppy Rage is "Temorarily Down". I am waiting to see if Markside can get a new server so that I can go back to him. If I can't, I need someone to host Sloppy Rage. Anyone can e-mail me with offers. If anyone from Ramblings, Slightlynorth, Baefed, or Solosier is reading this, please consider me. I only rape small animals.

The movie reviews section is complete. Come get some.

I called the local Ford dealer to get a quote on a rebuilt engine for my truck, and found out how damn incompetent they've become in the last couple years. I had a piece of shit Escort GT that I was always having problems with, so I was in there a lot, and there was this guy named Jared that worked there who was a badass. He was only a couple years older than me, and he was always honest with me. He even let me borrow tools from there a couple times.

He hasn't worked there for a couple of years, and they've only gone downhill since then. I had called last Wednesday to get a price quote, and was told I'd get a call back. When Monday rolled around and I hadn't gotten a call, I called them back to see what was up. Some woman answered, and said she'd find out who took my call the previous week, then put me on hold. Then some other woman got on and asked if she could help me. I explained that somebody was already helping me on a quote for a rebuilt engine. She started rambling off about a quote on an engine she had given somebody a week earlier. I asked how this was relevant to me, since I almost certainly had a different engine than whoever the hell she was talking about. She put me on hold again for just a sec, then got back on and was like, "Um...well...hmm...there doesn't seem to be anybody here that can give you a quote right now. Can you call back later?" For some reason, I got extremely pissed off just then. I started yelling at her, saying, "You guys are a bunch of fucking idiots!" and stuff like that. She just hung up on me. I usually don't get that pissed of, but I just snapped. I guess they didn't want my business that bad anyway...

I'm so out of shape. It had been a while since I rode my mountain bike, so I took it out for a spin today. There's a little dirt trail just outside of town that eventually ends, and you have to ride cross-country to get to this town called Kenilworth (the town I grew up in, actually) about 5 miles away. I had made the trip once in high school, but it kicked my ass so hard I ended up taking the next day off from school because I was so exhausted.

Well, I tried the trip again today, and I didn't even get close to Kenilworth before turning around and coming back. But I decided that I am going to get in shape and make the trip sometime this summer. And maybe even head down to Moab and check out some of that slickrock that everybody's always talkin' about. Then again, I do enjoy being lazy... :)

I finally got around to fixing the layout of the comments section. So now it and the news archives sections are back to normal. Since News Publisher uses the same header and footer for archives as it does comments, I had to edit the comments script so it didn't include the header and footer, then just added my HTML to it. The hardest part was figuring out which characters I had to escape, since I don't know perl hardly at all.

I also did a new layout for the contact page. It's probably a little strange to have a different layout for each section, but it keeps me from changing the layout of the main page every 2 or 3 days. :)

Plug: Cyclohexane

I was chattin' with a few of their staff members (Muffin and Kalebsan) on IRC, and figgered I'd give 'em a plug. Just pimpin' my hos, you know?

As a sidenote, I just decided that the plural of ho (hos) just doesn't look right like that. Most people spell it incorrectly as ho's, but that would be a contraction, not the plural form of the word. Like you cared, eh?

Update: Oh yeah, somebody pointed out that it's "hoes", but I suppose the same rule applies to that word as it does the word "potato", and that rule is that there is no rule--it can be potatos or potatoes...

I decided that since I watch so many movies, I'm going to put up a movie review section. C'mon, everybody's doing it. :) I'll work on a layout tomorrow and hopefully have it up with several reviews on Monday.

I watched Dave last night, and it's a pretty good movie. I had already seen it once a couple of years ago, but my wife hadn't, so we rented it. I like Kevin Kline quite a bit, and it had my main nigga Ving Rhames, Ben Kingsley, and Charles Grodin, who I also like. Anyway, it's a good movie, and chicks dig it as well, so check it out if you ever have the chance.

I tried ripping a tree stump out of my back yard with my truck today, and boy was that a joke. I dug about 2 feet down on one side of the stump and cut all the roots, then yanked from the other direction with a thick tow-rope. All I ended up doing is digging my truck into a hole and toasting my clutch a little. The tree stump didn't budge a millimeter.

I spent most of my day digging and cutting, and it didn't do me a god damn bit of good. I think the next logical step is to use explosives.

I got to talkin' to Skin (or is that skin?) on IRC last night, and we were checkin' each others sites out. I got an email from him this morning:

eh. bastard. lets swap links. take care.
--skin

Oh yeah, here's the link: Digital Murder. :)

I just watched Pushing Tin, and it was much better than I was expecting. I hadn't heard anything good about it, though I thought it looked ok when I saw the trailer. John Cusack is a badass, one of my favorite actors. In fact, I've only seen one movie with him in it that sucked ass, called Money for Nothing, in which he plays a dumbass who finds a couple million dollars that fell out of an armored truck.

I should be getting Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil in a couple of days, and I'm not sure I'll like that one either. Mebbe I oughta start a movie review section, since I've been watching so many movies lately. You gotta love NetFlix. :)

Link added: A Herd of Turtles. It's about time I did that. :)

Also, I noticed a neat little feature in Netscape 6. When you select text on a page that uses a background image, the selection is transparent, so you can still see the background. It's not a useful feature or anything, but it's kinda cool.

I had a nice little review of Netscape 6 Preview written up, but unfortunately, I was writing it using Netscape 6 Preview, and it fucked it all up, so here goes again:

Ty mentioned that Netscape 6 Preview has been released, so I figured I'd give it a try. So far, it's been nice, with the exception of the above-mentioned fuck up. I had written my story in News Publisher, clicked the Preview button, wanted to make a correction, clicked the Back button, and all my form data was gone. The good things about the Preview are: it (finally!) supports the CSS that I use on this page, and it doesn't reload the page when I resize the window. Another thing that doesn't work right yet is when you hit the enter key in a form, it doesn't perform the default action (usually Submit), so you have to click the button with the mouse or tab over to it and hit enter.

It looks pretty snazzy, though. I think when they get all the bugs worked out, Netscape will finally be giving Internet Explorer a run for its money.

Download the goods here.

Is it possible to just get dyslexia at age 23? I swear, lately when I'm typing, the letters I think I'm typing aren't the letters I'm actually typing. I often reverse letters, or sometimes combine two different words into one. My mind seems to be mixing the signals it sends to my hands. I think in the past couple years, I've slowly been becoming retarded. Drugs really do kill brain cells, kids. Probably.

Heh...I was just checkin' out Sloppy Rage. That's some funny shite. :) I hope Assman gets mIRC workin. I've been hangin' out on Badassmofo's irc server (142.207.9.12) quite a bit lately, and there's a fair amount of action there. Check it out.

I was trying to get a new layout going for the archives section, but News Publisher uses the same header and footer for the archives and the comments section, so right now the comments page says "News Archives" at the top. I'm entirely too lazy to fix it now, and I won't have time tomorrow, so I guess it'll have to wait until later in the week.

My arms are extremely sore right now. Wielding that chainsaw is a lot more difficult than I would have thought. But I got all the trees in my back yard cut down today, and I just have to finish cutting the wood up into movable pieces before I rip the stumps out with my truck. That oughta be fun. :)

I got the new layout up. I removed the linux desktop, since I don't boot into linux often enough to maintain it. I also added a little random thing to the top-right of the page. There are only a few sayings for now, so you'll be sick of 'em pretty quick. :)

If you have any strong feelings about the new layout, leave a comment in the comments section.

Oh yeah, I just bought a chainsaw. I was going to rent one, but none of the rental shops in town have any. I got a Poulan WoodShark 1950, with a 2 ci engine and a 14" blade. And lemme tell you, everyone should own a chainsaw. :) I sliced and diced some branches on the apple trees in my back yard, and it was very fun. Like butta, baby!

I've been working on a new layout for the site the past couple days, but I don't know if I like it yet. I may just scrap it and start over. It should be up tomorrow sometime, though.